Books Are Just Input, Not Bible Of Life

Its been quite sometime since i get to annoy Alvy to her face and yesterday was a blastful day of sweet sarcasm and reunion blended in one package. Its good to see her again and to know that she's been living well and happy within the union of Asian maids in Melbourne.

Aww Alvy, three rooms and two toilets isn't tough . You need to work hard to get that promotion and be a certified Philipino maid then you will be worldly recognised. At least your employer didn't burn your smooth and delicate skin with incense or cane you till you faint. As a matter of fact he married you and gave you a comfortable life eventhough you prepare weird dishes for daily consumption .

At this point of my blogging, i have this strong feeling that Alvina cannot wait to meet me again to cubit and strangle me with all her might until i admit defeat haha. Anyhow, thanks for your treat yesterday, the drink was sweet just like the person who bought it for me. As to your question " When do i intend to end my bachelorhood and settle down? " and i replied to you it is up to my lady {if i have one at the moment} lol

I believe in marriage we need to have the substance of respect, tolerance and trust and most importantly the ability to read each other at times, to reach into each other's soul. Telepathy can be found in friendship, in a married couple and among close relatives. However, for married couples, telepathy takes a reasonable amount of time to develop as the marriage goes on. It is not an instant thing and for that the bride or the groom cannot expect one or another to be able to read each other's thoughts and expectations as soon as the matrimony is sealed.

Marriage symbolises trust. It is because i trust the lady that i am handling the rest of my life to her and she feels the same too. A happy couple are often those who are able to deliver love from both sides. It is not that the guy is giving his best and the girl sits down and enjoy or otherwise. Both sides need to take care of each other's needs and emotions and by being able to do so, the element of respect is developed.

Ego shouldn't be a parting factor . Do not succumb to ideas such as the guy wears the pants in the family or lady has all the rights to be pampered. It is true that if a guy loves his lady he will pamper her but a lady should regard this as an act of love shown by her spouse not a privilege or something that he must do as a husband. A guy also should not restrict his wife to staying behind the walls of a home or else it wouldn't be a home instead its just another house or a prison cell. Marriage should be a beginning of a new freedom, a new chapter not the end .

Marriage should not be the cause that lead to stale relationships or boredom in reproducing the hormones of romance. By any chance if either party feels this way, then there should be a face to face session of sitting down and talk. It is best not to involve a third party and if there is a need for a third listener, that third person has to be at all ears and not providing constructive critism or comments that could break a happy marriage just because it is shaken . Marriages can get shaky after a period of time and some lasted, some don't.Third party sould be neutral and not one sided for if that is the case , it will not help to find a solution but speed up the process of separation.

In marriage and dating both alike, one must always be able to accept another unconditionally knowing for a fact that in future , it may get boring, it may feel like a routine instead of fiery passionate romance , life may seem like a robot . However, no matter how dull can it get, never allow oneself to have a second thought about the marriage. Once the lady or the guy have second thoughts about the marriage , for example "Did i make the right decision in marrying him?" or "Maybe i should have married the other guy" or " Maybe we shouldn't have tied the knot" ....such thoughts will bring us to other negative thoughts and soon negative thoughts about the marriage will pile up one by one like a failed game of Tetris and soon its just nothing else but Game Over.

Being married does not represent the end of dating. For some couples i have known,upon signing the agreement that binds two together, it means the relationship is already safe so there is no need to go out for dates as often or no need to be as mushy mushy as before for their love has gone one stage up. It is this kind of thinking that turns romantic feelings into responsibility. One must not love his spouse because his married to her but love her because she's the only one that completes him and without her life is incomplete. Take note, beng married doesn't mean the girl or guy must stay with each other forever. Forever only exist if one continues to believe that romance can still happen instead of harboring doubts and losing trust.

Why must a loving couple stopped being mushy mushy? and stopped being so close and clingy
to each other after a few years of marriage?Take my grandparents for example. At the age of 50 onwards they have been sleeping in separate beds eventhough it is in the same room. As a child i have been questioning this weird form of practise but according to the old folks it is their tradition and it is rude to question further.

It has also come to my knowledge that some couples still practise the lovey dovey part of their relationship after marriage but in a more formal kind of way. It means, it is different from the time they dated as young couples. Now that they have tied the knot, they have to behave more maturely and cannot kiss in the open or hold hands to cross the street?? isn;t this scenario very common? before marriage hold the girl tightly..don;'t want to let go even if palm gets all sweaty but after marriage of a few years, the guy walks far in the front and the lady is slowly chasing him. There were worse scenario or case studies of young guys walking fast ahead and their girlfriends are chasing after them like some poodle. Imagine before marriage already behaving in such a manner, after marriage?

My friend a bookworm whose into readings of body languages and facial expressions or better known as micro expressions had tea with me last night. This friend of mine can be classified as intelligent or an extremist. At times he accepts the content from books too seriously and turned them into his way of life or his philosophy in living life. My friend wanted to pass a book about facial expressions to another friend and he gave a brief explanation to us about its content.

According to my friend, the author of his book, teaches people, mostly laymen on how to capture people who are lying in action. It is best used to identify each time your girlfriend or wife cheats on you. Hence, i adviced him that this should not be the way of practising facial reading. Imagine each time your girlfriend or wife chit chats with the male florist or hunky gym instructor or friend and you see her facial expression shows interest and that she's being flirty and it leads to you having doubts and begin questioning her loyalty to you?

I mean we are human beings. As a guy, even if i have a girlfriend, if i happen to meet another beautiful girl, it is common and normal for me to take a second glance or engage into a conversation. It is the same for a lady. By any chance if a lady meet a handsome, hunky friend and had a good time talking to him and subconciously may have shown some flirtatious signs on her face, this is normal reaction for we are not perfect but we try our best to be good people and these shouldn't be used as topics to quarrel about.

My friend said don't have to quarrel just to know and to ask her accordingly. Well, once there are such questions of doubts it will lead to interrogation and upon interrogation it will lead to an arguement and then separation or cooling off period then separation.

We are just common human beings and we can control our feelings but not our reflexes. We cannot control ourselves from getting excited upon looking at beautiful creations or beautiful people. No matter how we control it, it will be shown through reflex. We as men cannot judge our women based on these qualities. We are not those desert tribes that forces our beloved ones to cover up their faces and not to speak to any other guy or else be banished or severely punished. No, we are not such barbarians .

We as men should not promise to love our ladies and then doubt them based on the way they look as they talk to other men.This is ridiculous and unfair.